Out of reach

Weekends are of utmost importance to me, because there's so much catching up to do. And having to work yesterday was... well, that's life for you, isn't it? To have so many things that are not within my control; Dad flying off back to work for another few months, having no time for Jack, skipping high tea with the family due to work... And this will have to go on for some time.

And you had to pop these little surprise on me. :) I'm not a sucker for jewelry, much less put them on. But you know they mean so much more for me when they're from you. And it's in my favourite purple, too.

I miss you.

Rich in love

... And I can't ignore the fact that working life is sapping us away from each other. But what is love when it's so attainable? Time has derailed many a relationships, simply because people get so used to the ease of having love with them, they grow paranoid whenever their partners say, "Sorry I'm too busy to meet you" and "sorry I've got no time". Time is the currency of love, apparently; it's not about how much you have, but how you spend and save it.

Happy 27th month. :)

"It's love of the highest order."

I was born into the late 1980s, so Dr. Goh Keng Swee was as close as a stranger to me. It was only after his demise that his name started to gain familiarity with me. Everything that he had done for the nation was well beyond what many overachievers had accomplished, and it is him that we all young citizens owe a beautiful and well-developed country to. The words of Mrs Goh Keng Swee in the Insight section of today's Straits Times caught me; it looked at the life of the Gohs from a different perspective, particularly the relationship they shared, even until Dr. Goh's departure.

It was a love of a different kind; the kind Mrs Goh said yes to even though she knew her prospective husband was diagnosed with bladder cancer. Yes, it would be rightful of every wife to put in immaculate effort to take care of her ailing husband, but how many had faltered along the way? She didn't. She didn't think about putting him in the hands of care-givers. She didn't think about letting others run chores for her when it came to buying supplies for her husband.

"My preoccupation was, as long as he was happy and comfortable, it was contentment for me."

And their love runs deep, evidently, as friends and as man and wife.

"During his last few days, I wanted to test his hearing because sometimes, earwax would block his ear passage. So I jokingly told him that I was going to leave him. Immediately, he answered, 'No! No! No!", and even gestured with his hands."

When a person's a good leader, it's important that everyone is unanimous about it. But when it comes to love, it only takes one person to decide whether he/she is the one worth spending one's whole life with.

"Will I miss him? What do you think? I've lived the past 20 years of my life just for him. I don't know what will happen next."

I teared when after reading the last line, because to lose the love of your life is simply too agonising to contemplate.

"It's love of the highest order."

Twice the love

It's been 3 days since I lost half my voice. It was reduced to less than an inaudible murmur during the JobsConnect event today, when I spent hours explaining stuff to candidates; I would find myself talking in goldfish mode halfway through the conversation because my voice just decided to die on me, and I had to resort to coughing (bad practice) to kick-start my voice box. PLEASE DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME OR ANYWHERE ELSE. Unless you have been on a concoction of trusty TCM products (courtesy of Jack's mummy. :) ) and various herbal tea mixes by the folks at home. I have 2 families who love me so much, it's almost like I don't deserve any of this at all.

Work has been... ok I shall cliffhang everyone here. Julie needs to recuperate and prepare for the long battle in office tomorrow.

Tired.

All I'm looking forward to, as the clock ticks towards 1am, are:

1. For my phone to ring, so that I can open the door for Dad, while every other apathetic self has gone to sleep.
2. Sleep. Plenty of it.
3. Tomorrow's BBQ.
4. Going back into those arms I long for these days.

And I'm clutching onto whatever rationality I have now, to struggle to stay awake.

Mount the horses.

My entries are going to take a huge cut within these two months, as I frantically struggle to juggle 3 tuition kids, an internship, meet-ups with my Peeeebles (yes, you heard it right), family commitments, my big baby a.k.a darling Jack and saving some time to restore my sanity. It's going to take a lot of effort to keep things from getting awry, and hopefully this is going to go a long way into my time management education.


Nights, people. It's going to be hell again tomorrow.

Last Day

Julie will be losing what's left of her free time tomorrow, when work commences along with tuition jobs. Oh well. It's only a matter of time, isn't it? So while many will be packing themselves on long graduation trips or stay-at-home holidays, I'll be trudging to work and nursing a bad bout of Monday blues along with the rest of the workforce in the country. Bless be.

Oh, and a Happy Mothers' Day to my mum, as well as to all the mothers in the world. It isn't easy being a parent, much more a mother. While some mothers in this day and time mollycoddle their spoilt brats to no ends, there are those who believe in the "spare the rod and spoil the child" adage. But whichever way is chosen to bring up their children, our mums still love us, don't they?

Sacrificial

The unsaid reality hurts, no matter how subtle it is; that today is probably the last 'free day' we could spend with each other before we both get shipped off to work like mad machines for the next few months. And life will only get tougher and more testing from now on, wouldn't it? I could really do with some crumpling-into-a-heap-of-wild-crying.

But we did try to make the best out of today, didn't we? Talking about copyright and digital book databases over lunch, picking out different colours and designs of working shirts for you and watching you in that shirt like a proud spouse, having you nap with a gentle snooze and your arms around me while I finished up on my book, scouring every video shop in Suntec and Marina Square for the films we wanted to watch so badly, watching you wolf down that Zinger and cheese fries and Pepsi (who says I deprive him of his carnivorous needs?), having you rub my arm when I got agitated by the bad traffic, and right to the very last moment of kissing you goodbye.

I didn't want to say goodbye. And I wished I never have to do so.

And despite the stupid things I always say to irritate you, you know I'm so helplessly in love with you. Forever and always.



I miss you.

Movie: Ip Man 2

The movie junkie couple is caught in a movie moment they can't escape from. Ip Man 2 was the next watch on our grilling list.

It was unfortunate that, like other sequels, Ip Man 2 fell short of what the prequel had offered, largely because people tend to expect alot more from the second-parter should the former do well. While it didn't wow, the fighting scenes were still marvellous to the last minute; crap, just hire Sammo Hung if you want great moves. Hung impressed with his clean moves and emotional scenes, despite the fact that he was a little on the hefty side and looked all parts of a serious guy. When his character died halfway through (oops spoiler!), I was hit by a nascent bout of tears to watch the man collapse under the merciless blows of a peabrain boxer. Gah I need to cry. Anyway we all know the cliched ending, don't we? Anyway news has been flying around regarding the casting for Ip Man 3. My stand: get Jay Chou to play Bruce Lee and I swear I'll lead a boycott team. Just listen to Donnie Yen and stop cashing in on this Ip Man mania.

Movie: Iron Man 2

The serial movie junkie couple is back in action after a relatively long hiatus, and what movie could be more symbolic than Iron Man 2?

We chose this over Ip Man 2 because, quoting Jack, it's a Marvel production! We're all willing victims of Americanization, aren't we? LOL. Anyway I got kind of lost at the start because I couldn't draw a link between that tattooed Russian and Tony Stark, and more questions began to pop up in my head 15 minutes into the show. Why was his father dying? Why would he wanna build a scary killer machine to whip Iron Man apart? Why is he avenging his father? Huh? Huh? Huh? But I was too busy trying to feed Jack nachos in the dark to allow the questions to linger. Shall not be a spoiler here, since audience in the US of A will only get the movie (read movie poster) on 7th May. But it sure is a movie the boys would love to go to; it has their favourite superhero clad in gold and red saving the day with his silver sidekick, babelicious Scarlet Johansson in skin-tight bodysuits and killer moves to knock men off their feet with (pun intended), a huge badass going around whipping things apart with his high-voltage lash, in-your-dreams technology that shifts things around when you flick them with your fingers and, of course, a set of wheels every respectable man wants in his garage. Except Iron Man had other plans for his, which happens to be a white soft-top 5.2L V10 Audi R8 Spyder. That's a mouthful.

Jack and I totally cracked up at this scene.

Anyway Julie decided to kill time - while waiting for her knight to finish his last paper - by conjuring my own version of Aglio Olio. Not too bad, except I could have used angelhair pasta or my favourite penne instead of fettuccine. Not to mention I used a considerable amount of my stash of olive oil at home. -_-

Starting my internship on Monday, so it'll be hitting the stores over the next few days to get office wear!

Precious.

I'm going to get walloped a gazillion times when Jack finds out that I'm far from being asleep at this time, especially when (not meant to dig into anybody's wounds) I've finished my papers last Friday. But I needed this time to think about alot of things that have happened ever since I've entered Uni, since this year may very well spell my graduation. I don't know. I shiver at the thought but, hey, there's always two sides to a coin (although Jack will probably tell me it's pseudo random). I'll love to do honours, because that will mean taking modules I really wanna take, sticking with that bunch of crazy NM people and, most importantly, graduating with Jack. I know that'll mean many more crazy mugging hours to chalk up and less time with Jack and my family, but we're all wary of the sacrifices we've got to make for a better tomorrow, don't we?

I'm rambling.

Today, anyway, was beautiful, right to the last minute. After attending Jack's cousin's baby shower, it really felt as though we're a step closer to life like that; attending family functions together, migling with relatives, learning more and more about the close-knit bonds between families... It's really heartwarming to know that I'm welcomed with arms wide open without any judgement made, and I know you're glad as well. Like how Granddad smiled when we visited. It makes me cry tears of joy everytime. :)

Bouts of happiness

Those sweet dreams came back the moment I closed my eyes and laid beside you, feeling the warm spot where you had shifted from just moments ago to make space for me. Dreams too beautiful to describe and rarely appropriate the moment, considering the fact that you're still busily mugging for your last exam. I seldom had dreams this semester, because my brain's simply too held up by the regenerating of cells for the next battle ahead. Let me dream some more, I beg of whoever creates dreams; please give me back those dreams I've been missing out on, those mirages of silver and gold and of you and me.

And so the day was largely peaceful; little tutee was visibly exhausted after his heavy MacDonald's breakfast so I decided to go easy on him today. And with whatever puny amount I had in the paycheck I received today, I decided to spurge on muffins for the house and egg tarts for Granddad. I haven't been a great granddaughter as of late, often skipping family dinners and chances to just chat with him and answer those questions he often repeated to keep in tandem with the ongoings in each family. I had been close to my paternal grandparents, and I sorely regretted not spending enough time with my late grandma before she passed on. I have to keep such mistakes at bay, because I tend to hate myself over them.

And I've got to give credit to Jack for being by my side the entire time, for enduring the unbearable heat wave to mug at my place. The least I could do, as someone madly in love with him, to provide him with a conducive environment to study in, and somewhere to sleep when he takes a much-needed power nap, and good food from out great chef in the family. Haha. He would agree. :)


I miss you. Can you come into my dreams tonight?