Big boys don't lie

I’m having second thoughts about shopping at Far East Plaza before the tykes end their June holidays. I had the naïve plan of leveraging on the GSS (surprisingly, I was leveraging on the fact that many shops were holding their closing down sales), but instead, I felt like an auntie, weaving through the teenage crowd and jostling with adolescents with thick make-up slapped on and eyes straight out of a horror flick. I’ll never pull something like that off without clogging up every single pore on my face and committing suicide when I break out like a pre-NS teenage dirtbag. I’m barely 21 and I feel like a mountain tortoise at that torturous place, so I’m not contemplating another shopping trip there until the last week of June.



Oh, special mention. Can I emphasize the fact that our lovely teen boys are blossoming into young men who simply love to gossip about girls? Well, the junior college boys who sat behind me on the bus on the way home were great samples of proof. While peppering their chat with sudden gasps of “Aye! Look! Chiobu!” (Chiobu means ‘pretty girl’), they were pretty much talking out loud about their crushes, the pretty girls they wanted to ask out in their class or from their previous schools, why some of their guy friends didn’t deserve their current girlfriends because they were too pretty, and pretty much stuff that would make the post-NS guy cringe. I guess that was a reason good enough to explain why guys before NS will always be dorks. But altogether, it was pretty entertaining, simply because they were saying things that sounded like they came out of the teething mouths of Primary school kids. Funny stuff one guy kept babbling: “Eh, where are we arh? Clementi? That means we’re near Bukit Batok!”; “Wah! Singapore Poly wor! Looks like Botanic Gardens!”; “Where are we going ah? IMM ah? Issit Lot 1? Same right?” I totally sympathized his friends, who had to 1. convince him that IMM and Lot 1 are 3 MRT stations apart, 2. Clementi certainly did not look like Bukit Batok and 3. Botanic Gardens does not reside on a hill. I almost had constipation trying to hold back my sniggers. So that’s for you, all 17 years of Singaporean boys. I’m not stereotypical; I’m concise.