Chore~

I seriously view it as a severe case of lack of adoration on my part to be feeling this way at this point of time, and I'm totally annoyed because I'm feeling this way. I should go find a wall and run into it until I wake myself up.

I'm supposed to finish memorising all 46 characters of katakana today. I said supposed, which obviously meant that I didn't; I couldn't even manage 10 before zoning out into oblivation. At this snail-pace I'm going at, it'll probably take me another 10,000 light years to get everything right. Someone kindly clobber me to death.

Finally some things got ironed out 2 days ago, and seems like things are going fine for the both of them now. I didn't want to face the real side of him, because it's not what everyone's made him out to be. The past 2 months or so haven't been easy on him, with everything crashing in at the same time. I tried to look at everything from a neutral perspective, but I realised I couldn't be, even if he might have been the ultimate source of it all and the other party was being victimised all along. I couldn't bring myself to nod along and support the idea of pointing my accusing finger at him because I wasn't in a postion to do so. If things could be ironed out privately and not be cast under the media's hawk-eyed attention, I'll do anything for it. So I'm really sorry if I didn't support the idea of making him look bad in public. I simply can't bring myself to do it, even if he's two-faced and all that. I believe he did everything for a reason, and even if the reason hadn't been valid enough to excuse him of all allegations, I'll still be on his side. I'll be selfish, I'll choose to protect him, just like what she did.

Passe~

Someone find me my USB cable.

I believe life was being fair to me when I passed my driving test today; I’m probably one of the few poor souls who failed my BTT, got numerous scoldings from my instructor-granduncle, hit the kerb countless times today during my final practice circuit session today, drove under extreme weather conditions, and still managed to pass the first time round. Oh well, all my intensive lessons are well worth. Bring on the next challenge.

Then Doey popped by the driving centre while I was waiting for my temporary driving license, and that definitely surprised me. He said that he was just being supportive, since he passed his test only the nth time round. So his car had the honour of being my first vehicle on the road. Thanks man, bro. Remind me of my Munchie Monkeys treat, hor.Haha.

Dad was hurrying me to buy my ‘P’ plate over several sms-ses, so I tried looking for one at IMM. Guess what?! Not a single place there sold that orange triangle~ I was pretty pissed, but I joked that no one wanted me to get onto the roads. Haha. Doey just showed me that signature expression of his. After I dropped myself off, I got spotted by my aunt’s maid. How I wish I could be the one feeding the cats instead. Then she saw Doey’s car and gave me that look.Oh c’mon.If I had a boyfriend, I’ll bring him home to show my Mum and Dad first.

No matter what, thanks to Mr. Doey (hope the tips I provided on guitar and vocals are useful), and thanks to a very entertaining day (albeit hectic).

Jabbering Gibberish

I have an extremely soft spot for all kinds of fruits, other than durian (despite the fact that I'm a true-blue Singlish-jabbering Singaporean). You name it, I eat it. Visits to the market are probably one of my favourite recreation activities, and I can pop by the fruit stall and pick up my fifth batch of Granny Smith apples for the week. My dad's absolutely abhorrent of this habit, because that leaves him no space in the fridge for his weekly pick-ups of veggies by the bulk. I'm sorry, but I'm not sorry for that. How I wish I could add those lovely punnets of grapes to my hands, if it weren't for the fact that they were overloaded with apples, pears, oranges, green grapes (yes I want both my green AND red globes) and bananas. Anyone fancy a fruit picnic?
The CORS registration system can really get on my nerves at times. Just last semester, I was still left dangling with 2 modules into the first week of lectures. This time round, it threw me a 1-hour tutorial on Friday. HELLO?! FRIDAY'S MY FREE DAY.
F-R-E-E.
Do you need me to spell it out with phonetics? I'm just totally pissed. The entire system should just crash and land everyone in a state of pandemonium.

I'm totally done with Hiragana. Period. I'm not even rejoicing. The end of something signifies the start of something else. On with Katakana. Man, I sound totally bored.

Oh ya, and did I mention that I'm going to wash my hands off other people's demos? So STOP sending me your demos, because I don't have time to decipher your gibberish lyrics and tunes which seriously need some, urm, fine-tuning.

Is it Saturday yet?

The plastic container of milky liquid stowed away in a corner of the fridge appears to be the remainder of my sis's attempt at baking egg tarts. I heartily wolfed down more than just a couple to substitute my dinner, because no one stops this Missus when she spots her darling egg tarts. Alright, as usual, her final products weren't visually appealing, but fireworks went off in my head when I closed my eyes and popped one in my mouth. It tasted like those decent ones you get at bakeries. My sis'd better not hear about this, or she'll suffer from a bout of ego inflation.

Fridays are lovely days, and lesson-free Fridays are the best days in the entire calendar. I get to spend the entire day trying to cram all 46 characters of Hiragana into my puny brain, plastic-wrapping my Japanese coursebooks, recording an accompanied version of Doey's nameless demo, thinking up a melody for my own song (which I eventually settled for the fool-proof C major scale chords) and cooked my own lunch. My ultimate carefree day~

Jack's demo was pretty good, considering it to be a really raw version with just vocals and his guitar. I tried to do my own version of his song and failed miserably. I took Doey's song into my own hands, because the poor guy's demos only had his voice and nothing else. So I threw in some chords, filled lyrics in the parts where he was just "lala"-ing away and the portions where he was incoherent, and took out his pre-chorus. NX took a listen to my version and threw out a million ways to improve it, and I was really thankful because I really needed someone professional enough, but not too intimidating, to comment on the demo. Time to throw this back to Mr. Doey and work on my own song, which is still lacking a decent melody for its verses. What the hell.

Falling short

It'll be pure suicide if I were to post my semestral timetable here; I've got Fridays free, which means I've got the looongest weekend~! I'm maniac at this point of time, but I guess that's what the night does to you when you’re extremely tired but still dead persistent on finishing up your hiragana. I was just telling Jack over lunch that I’m being reduced to a Primary school kid writing her most-hated Chinese character practice. But I’m pretty okay with the writing style of Japanese characters, because the characters look simply artistic wherever they may appear, even on a packet of value-dollar chips.

I didn’t feel guilty about skipping Geyao yesterday; I’m glad I made the mistakes on my test routes there and then, instead of screwing up during the examination itself. The numerous hair-dryer treatments received from my granduncle have been useful, and I really hope I’m going to clear the bar the first time round. It’ll be plain excruciating to take the test a second, third time. C’mon, it’s just 1 week to the test! I can do it!

Blind-founded

I've got to be the biggest goon in the entire Milky Way; how could I have even noted the wrong timing for my PS lecture? Instead, I ended up in the correct lecture, facing the wrong lecturer and a screen which said EC3... So yup, I didn't get to attend my first PS lecture, all thanks to my blindness. I did manage to get my LAJ notes, and that's a cause for celebration because blind me couldn't even find it yesterday, when it was sitting besides the Yong Tau Foo stall in the Arts Canteen. It's high time I went for Lasik.

Life is a big f**king joke

It’s basically a hapless venture; I shouldn’t have brought myself so much hope in the first place. To decline me flatly would hurt, but to say stuff like “Don’t ask me this kind of things I don’t know” in a couldn’t-care-less, nonchalant manner is plain murder. I will never understand what you really mean, except the fact that you’re pitting yourself against my patience. Yes, I’m young, adventurous and reckless. But shouldn’t you be more responsible for raising your child in a proper manner instead of your “don’t ask me” attitude. I’m so put off. As least Dad understands, and he bothers to ask about the details. You? Do you even bother to get the facts right? Do you even bother about your child? Do you even bat an eyelid? Now you should guess why I keep running away from you.

I’m going to keep myself busy AND out of the house as far as possible, so that I don’t have to face a happy family full of irony.

All thunder and no rain

It wasn’t to my liking; too many people, too little time. Of course, there’s stuff to laugh about and some songs were enjoyable, but it’ll probably fall under my list of bad karaoke experiences. It just urged me to stick to my usual bunches of friends for karaoke sessions if I wish to step out feeling like the entire session was well-worth. Oh, and those shades dug out of my mum’s drawer, albeit being a free gift, played a huge role in hiding my disappointment.

Warped

The gritty feeling is gone. I’m just praying really hard that swell in my throat will dissipate by tomorrow, so that the karaoke session with my Geyao peeps will progress smoothly without hiccups. It’s been quite a while since we turned our karaoke venue topsy-turvy, and I’m totally looking forward to my first session with some of them. Of course, Louis the Great and Vern the Great will be there, so good luck to us.

Emotions ran high after bid points and bidders for the Japanese Studies module I was eying started to soar. Every round, I’d approach my keyboard with much trepidation and confusion, contemplating my next move; should I keep my bid point at status quo or throw the entire lump sum from my General account into it? I’m on the verge of becoming schizophrenic with every bidding round. Last semester’s bidding was a total nightmare for me, because while everyone’s in school attending lectures, I was furiously stuck to my computer screen, assaulting the F5 key every 10 seconds to refresh the bidding statistics. Tomorrow’s going to be another tormenting day, with 2 modules to go for and 700+ points to share between them. I’m on a sadistic high.

Really huge apology to Jack; my Internet connection is too wacky for my own good. The last thing we were discussing before I got thrown off the network was my perilous and lonely relationship journey. I promise not to avoid this topic anymore; running way wouldn’t help, and facing it wouldn’t kill either. But I won’t bring it up of my own accordance, because it’s not something worth flaunting. In fact, I would most probably be deemed as stupid to hold onto something for that long and end up being victimized by my own naïve belief. Yes, I’m put off by the very idea of delving into a relationship at this point of time partially because of this, and also due to the fact that there’s so much more to be accomplished other than being part of a relationship. Yes, it’s just another bunch of sour grapes.

Driving me nuts

I must have been possessed when I said "Yes" to slotting my driving lesson at 7.30am tomorrow morning; how could I have forgotten about the maniac rush-hour traffic? Plus, that means I've got to get my arse up at 6.30 if I don't wish to be late. Well, I'm hoping everything goes well tomorrow (which includes not getting yelled at, not hitting any kerbs, not ignoring the blinking green arrow, remembering my blind spots, counting the kerb correctly, not obstructing traffic, not messing up my U-Turns...).

School starting in 5 days' time, and I'm totally looking forward to that. I'm still considering if I should take Science of Music, because my Geyaorian peeps are contemplating that only next semester. So should I give up on this module this semester and save if for next semester? Or should I just go ahead with it and be a lone ranger during lectures and tutorials? I'm totally stuck.

I need to get my voice back by Thursday, no, by Wednesday.

What a year

It irks me whenever I sit down to draft my New Year Resolutions, because I know I'd never fulfilled half of them. I think I didn't set any for myself last year. Yeah, I think I didn't. What a relief. I'll go for the less tangible stuff this year, because they easily illusionalize people; they seem easier to fulfill but, in fact, it's more in-depth and much more fulfilling.

It doesn't bode well if you have to reach deep into your pockets at the start of the year, and that's (unfortunately) what I'm experiencing now. Too much has went into karaoke, CDs, instruments, ... If this continues, my planned Taiwan trip will go bust. As well as my inpromptu HK trip if everything goes well by the end of May. As well as my HK David Tao concert. As well as my SG David Tao concert. Those sure add up to an astounding number of zeroes. So the first bimbotic resolution is to save, save and save. Or at least pass my driving test the first time round so I wouldn't have to waste more money on more lessons. They're a pain in the arse.
And I'm seriously hoping to gain new depth in music, because I've been relying largely on it to keep me sane and cheery all this while. I've never been able to describe this passion aptly with any word/phrase/sentence/essay; it's intrinsic. So I'm hoping to expose myself to more forms of music and experience, because that's what reinforces the fundamentals of understanding music. Theory isn't everything.

This is probably the most insane project of all but, yes, I'm adamant about getting to know my close friends more in the emotional sense. I didn't like the feeling of losing grip in this arena, because I'm 100% made of emotions through and through, and I want to believe in my ability to understand those around me to a certain extent. Some find me extremely nosey or intruding, but I can't help it if I can tell from the way you look at me that you're thinking about a certan something. That's me, and I won't change it for the sake of saving someone grace. I'm not sure how many people I've hurt with my psychic understanding, but I hope it's a boon, not a bane.