Hypothetical disability

I'm reading the signs and calibrating those vague impressions, making a hypothesis and predicting the next stept to contemplate. I might be wrong again this time round, but I'm not letting loose of any glimmer of chance. Past lessons taught me to keep to myself and shield myself from the blows of reality, but I'm prepared to make the same old mistake all over again. The wounds incurred in the past have start to scab and fade away, and their diminishing visibility has fuelled my opportunistic ambitions.The time has come.

Aww... where has all the fun gone to

Everyone's having alot of fun with their blogs; Fay's got loads of laughable vids from YouTube on hers, Evan's is full of Avril Lavigne, DD has got alot of pretty pictures... My blog's plain and boring.

Tomorrow's Fay's last day, but I doubt the people in her department will be treating her to something good. They've never really treated her in a very friendly way, anyway. Sigh...

My astrology says that my love sign's unusually strong this week, so I should give a small little present to the one I fancy to catch his attention. What a load of bovine excrement.

Spare me of the silence

Yes, I'm friggin' irritated.
I'm terribly bugged by the fact that you're the ONLY ONE in the office who's ignoring me. I'm annoyed by your nothing-has-happened attitude. I'd rather you told me off the other day than to treat me like someone whom you'll dispose off at the end of the month. I like to feel part of this small cluster of friendships, instead of being treated like an outsider. Perhaps you felt that maintaining your silence will ease the tension but, on the contrary, it's building up instead.
And it's getting on my nerves.
And you probably still wouldn't understand.
Forget it.

Darlin'... tell me what to do to make things right

Say hello to my new darling. He's sleek, sophisticated, and most importantly, he's WHITE.

Haha.

That was misleading.

I was talking about my new lap darling- the Fujitsu LifeBook. I had spotted the Fujitsu IT show in the newspapers a few days ago, and thought it was pleasing on the eyes and the configurations were pretty impressive. The salesman was fervently recommending the laptop to me and my (somehow uninterested) mum, and I had no way out but to stey focused while my mum's attention drifted off to the Watsons' outlet. So after a few rounds of talking-to and playing with some of the features, I nodded.

So it turned out that the sales guy was also waiting for Uni admission and, coincidentally, to the same Uni as me. Whatever. And he was blabbering on and on and on... and on about how he regretted choosing that particular course, all these and more despite the fact that I was less than interested.

So the day ended with a very satisfied me and a very dissatisfied Mum (who couldn't find that Coach outlet).

Take me for a spin again and I'll rip your testicles out

Dinner was supposed to be enjoyable, amidst all the anticipation for something much more palatable. *Bleah* I expected something much much much more stomach-friendly and mood-appeasing than hawker food, much more at the Esplanade.What a spoiler.

The cab ride added fuel to the fire. What in the ****ing hell did the taxi driver take us for? Bleary-eyed, easy prey for a spin at Marina South? He even asked us if we were tourists. Oh, so you would knock the daylights out of us by charging us heavenly sums for a dumb taxi ride if we were? I, for a fact, DID NOT buy the fact that we had to pay S$8.40 for a retarded ride from the Esplanade to Marina South. THAT didn't make dinner seem more precious. THAT didn't make our meeting more meaningful.

My entire evening, night and early morning was ruined.

RETARDED.

Run away to another paradise

Another chalet on the slots!
I'm getting those pink bubbles every time I think about our upcoming chalet. It'll be at our very laid-back Sentosa this time round, so hopefully I'll be in the mood to take my mind off work and indulge in the serenity of our lovely island. Night cycling, spending the entire night hooking up the WiFi at MacDonald' and welcoming the sunrise at Siloso Beach... Lovely. I'm getting those pink bubbles again.

When the sighs come marching in

NX's persistant phone calls told me something wasn't right.
"Important call", she messaged.
"They say, they don't have your model's machinehead le. Too old le."
*Sigh*
"They only have silver ones. No gold-plated ones."
*Sigh*
So my darling will only come back to me in another month's time.
*Sigh*
Looks like I shall have to continue to rely heavily on my steelstring darling.

Short attention span

Call me a procrastinator if you must, because my ATT is merely 10 days away and I've just start to flip through that wickedly confusing book. I'm finding it a chore to go through that book because 1.I've got to endure all that teeny weeny print and a whole dozen loads of confusing explanations. You simply can't put everything and anything practical into a book and expect a goondu like me to comprehend everything and 2.I'm simply lazy to the core.I'd rather do unimportant stuff like compiling all the scores of my favourite songs into a jotter book and paint my nails an autistic hue and indulge in my newly acquired NFS Carbon than to study for something blaringly urgent.

In the meanwhile, most of my friends have decided to play hide-and-seek with me by disappearing althogether from my MSN screen and cellphone. I think I must be the only one who's that free to come online 4 times a day.

Throwing it all out

I'm alright now.

I guess everyone needs to take out some time from life to take a breather. I guess the self-oppression didn't work out so well; I did some injustice to my eyes and nose yesterday in the office and I'm still feeling terrible about it. "Venting it out is better than keeping it inside- you'll soon explode," my colleague advised. I guess he was right. I tend to keep stuff inside to deny others of the tragedies erupting in my life, because I don't appreciate sympathy from others, neither do I want fingers to point at me and accuse me of shedding crocodile tears. When I'm upset, I'm thoroughly through with all sensible thoughts in my head. Forgive me if I happen to be incoherent or incorrigible these few days. I just need some brain power to sort things out.

Self-detonation

Maybe that’s what people deem as self-disbelief. In the most distraught of times and during the most hectic moments, the arrows start firing themselves back at me. The perpetuator? Me, myself and I. If only I could stand firm and not sound like a pushover, will people not start to take advantage of my soft spots. That’s going to take a whole lot of courage. Courage to stand against all odds, courage to thump my fist firmly on the table and say “No”, courage to stay true to myself and courage to fight back those tears which overwhelm my words whenever I feel like I can’t take things any longer. I guess I only have myself to blame.

Congestion of the empty mind

If I'm seen blogging at this moment of time, it means I'm terribly bored off my socks. It's an irony because 2 days ago, I was working 2 hours past my normal working time, rushing to complete the nasty paperwork portion of my job. Perhaps if I could have just procrastinated a little more and delayed stuff a bit, then maybe I could have avoided the unnecessary comical harassment from my colleague who was working late that day. *Bleah*

Things are spinning a little out of control. Events start to flood in, and my calendar's getting a little squeezy. ATT, registration for Uni, the could-have-been-redundant medical check-up, repairing my darling guitar (which I'll be passing over to NX later on in the day)... I'm mentally congested.Someone get me those carbon pills.